Thursday, 3 September 2009


The other day I was reading a post by Sunny and she was talking about whether or not she should get anything done to her body in order to look more appealing, younger or what have you. Reading that post put me in mind of a poem I had heard only a few days earlier about a lift. And no, it wasn't about the up-and-down version or the ride-with-me version. It took me a while to find it and then I had to translate it, but here it is!

When the first wrinkle arrived, I got in a panic
I then had my face lifted in a pricy clinic.

My husband thought I looked fantastic
My face was (again) elastic.

No wrinkle, no fold
I looked honeymoon old.

Then my husband said:
"Your face doesn't fit your neck".

A little tuck and they pull it tight
A cut here and it looked right.

My husband he was very happy
About me looking so snappy.

The surgeon however had another blow
My boobs were now too low.

After lifting them, they looked a bit small
But some silicon made them look great and all.

Well, my man nearly had fits
Because I had fantastic tits!

But one night after sex, no lies
He had a comment about my thighs.

Don't get me wrong, no critique
But I went back to the clinique.

I had a belly too, so after a little talk
I had it sucked away, I didn't balk.

My butt cheeks were lifted the very same day
About an inch or five I would say.

At every party I was a wonder
Even considering the stress my body was under.

However, my husband felt like he was on the dogcart
Boys would yell: hey, old fart!

So, he tried again to look like a young tomcat
Dyed his hair and bought a tight corset.

And after all that he even did a bout
Of running, swimming and working out.

For months he followed a stringent diet
Until one day in the sauna he died.

There I stood at his grave looking great
But the fun was gone, it was too late.

Ladies, let all those people nag
And let your bits quietly sag.

Cherish your belly, thighs and chins
Real beauty comes from within!


  1. I'm still laughing from when you left this in my comments! Great poem, thanks for sharing.
    Sunny :)

  2. How very true - and that doesn't even mention the ladies who die under the knife or get disastrous results!

    I wouldn't do it. Be nice to have a magic wand though, huh? LOL!

  3. I laughed and laughed when I read it. "Seasoned" bodies are earned.



Any weighty (and not so weighty) comments are welcome!