Murphy and the cats

Something else that originated in Ireland

Have you ever heard of Murphy's Law? Everything that can go wrong will go wrong? Apparently originating in Ireland?

Have you ever lived Murphy's Law? Dropped a just buttered piece of toast by accident? And it of course landed butterside down. Because it's after all Murphy's Law!

Going on a completely different strain of thought now though: did you ever see a cat fall out of a second story window? Guess what: the likelihood of it landing on its feet is nearly 100%! 

I promise: I never pushed a cat out of a window!!!

But... what happens if you put a bit of buttered toast with the butterside up on the back of the cat and then gently push it out of the second floor window. Would the cat land on its feet? Or would the cat fall on its back thanks to the buttered toast and Murphy's Law? 

In fact it's neither. The two would balance each other out and the cat with the toast on its back would just hover in mid-air. At first of course the cat would be in total panic. But after a while he would relax. Even start to purr.

Now purring cats make a sound. And this sound was heard by beings far far away. Very far far away. Beings that wanted to conquer the world. But how? After all, they only had one functioning flying saucer, which isn't much in the whole conquer the world scheme! 

Is it one? Found in Germany.

The answer was those cats. So, with the one flying saucer they had, they came down to earth, caught all the cats, got all the bread, a few toasters and of course butter and flew off to wherever. After a few days of severe toasting and buttering they finally were able to get the cats all fitted out. And after fitting the cats to all the saucers, the pushed everything out of a second story window and off they went. 

There was a problem though. They had left the care of the cats in the hands of some disinterested youths. They preferred to watch Mrs Brown's Boys and listen to U2 than feed the cats. And cats get hungry. And when cats get hungry they will try to find food. Guess what: there was food on their own backs!!

Gougane Barra in County Cork

You might be able to guess what happened next. The cats contorted and ate the toast on their backs. Which meant that instead of hovering and flying, the saucers now went hurtling down. All the way to earth. Where the cats landed on their feet and escaped. The saucers made huge holes in the ground that quickly filled with water, creating the small and big lakes now dotting Ireland. The aliens didn't stand a chance and perished.  

So, next time you see a lake, remember: don't ever tie a piece of buttered toast to the backside of a cat! 

This was a bit of Blarney prompted by Spin Cycle. Thank you Ginny Marie at Lemon Drop Pie and Gretchen at Second Blooming.

PS: no cats were harmed in this story. Well, apart from the cats that landed on that island in the Irish Sea that is. They got their tails caught underneath the saucers, leaving all the cats on that island tailless for ever!!