Chauffeuse

In Dutch my jobtitle is a buschauffeur. Nicely taken from the French as so many other words in our language as well. Like directeur or masseur. And people immediately think that because I am a woman the jobtitle should be womanised. Or femalised or whatever you call it. Making me a chauffeuse!

Now, a few years ago I heard the description of a chauffeuse: it's a woman who heats up elderly French men. So, needless to say, I never called myself a chauffeuse again!

A couple of days ago I had some people on the bus and they again called me a chauffeuse. I immediately told them the proper meaning and the conversation then went on to know what I considered to be old. In French men that is.

So you all know: French men are okay up to the age of 35, after that: no! Italian men are okay as well. Up to the age of 35 as well. As long as you don't catch a mama's boy (which I once did and jealous to boot) of course!

And then came the best part of the day: whether I really meant that 35 was too old? Well, in French men? Of course I meant it. But surely I wasn't old enough to know! I am 41, I think I am old enough to know thank you very much!! Well, I certainly didn't look 41 yet! Wasn't he nice?

PS1: if it were young French men I needed to heat up, I might reconsider calling myself a chauffeuse. Or youngish whatever nationality men looking like Matt Damon. Definitely a chauffeuse then!!!

PS2: I believe the proper French title for a female busdriver or any driver would be conductrice. Which happens to be a train ticket controller in the Netherlands. What do you mean: confusing!

Mostly planned

Bergen is known for the rain.
Let's hope it stays dry during my stay!

Well, the hotel is booked and so is the flight. Originally I was due to leave on the 20th, but the hotel was full that night, so I changed my flight (for only €5,00!) and now I am leaving the next day. I will be staying in a hotel in the center of Bergen for a week and will do everything zebra-like or with public transport. I will send an e-mail to Tide Buss as well, saying I will be in Bergen for a week, so we can also plan our "intervju".

In order for me to actually be able to talk during said interview I have also booked another Norwegian class. Again for 20 hours, but this time a different (and a bit more expensive) company. On Monday I will have an intake/first lesson to see how far I am and what is needed to get me to the B1 level.

So, the plan is coming along nicely. Two more weeks of work (well, sort of, there's not much to do due to the holiday), then a week off properly, a week of Norwegian classes, a week of Christian Youth Festival goers to England and then a week off in Norway. Busy busy busy!

'Movement'

I have liked this photo ever since I first took it back in the winter. The two girls were trying to walk on ice and not the flat ice either. Due to the wind and the thawing of the ice, it had broken up and then amassed in great big mountains near the coast of Urk. It was absolutely freezing cold due to the wind and because the surface was so uneven, it was actually pretty dangerous as well. I think the girls managed to stay upright though, although this photo might suggest otherwise!

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The difference

Pigs take powernaps too!

What a difference a day makes. On Sunday night I made my way to bed at 8.30pm, I never expected to sleep, but I was fortunate enough that I did. So, when my alarm went off at 1.30am, I was quite awake and refreshed.

By 2.30 I was ready to go and started driving. I met up with my colleague and together we made our way to our starting point. We were nice and early, but it didn't take long before the first people started to arrive. We left a little late, but managed to get to our finishing point in time anyway, where our two colleagues were already waiting to continue the journey. And since the colleague I had driven with hadn't been to bed at all and I had, I drove back.

By the time I finally made it home though, I was starting to feel the effects of such a weird night and I actually took a little nap on the couch (well, an hour and a half). After which I was much refreshed and was able to continue the day.

This morning I didn't have to start so early, but I did have to work late tonight and didn't make it home until 11.30pm. And people wonder I occasionally get ill! Tomorrow I can also start fairly late, but I will finish quite early, traffic and weather permitting.

I didn't think

Church in Klietz, Germany where I stayed Monday
Notice the bullet damage at the top!

Did I ever tell you I hate cherries? Even if they do top a cake, they are not always great as I found out!

I had asked for this weekend off, when I was told I had to work on Monday morning. Taking a group to Germany for my colleague (who would take over in Germany and go the rest of the way). But said colleague was already leaving on Sunday, so there was a bit of confusion. In the end the confusion got untangled though and we knew what was what. He starts Sunday to go to a hotel, I start Monday to take his people to the hotel, where we change and I drive back home.

So far, so good. And then I asked where the group had to come from. Turns out it is close to both the German and Belgian border: all the way in the south of the Netherlands. And I had to leave there at 7am! Well, after telling the planner off for giving me the weekend off and then giving me this trip, he backtracked and was willing to let me start later. Of course I felt okay at that time and said, nooo, don't worry, I will do it. You can owe me!

I am sorry I said that now. Because in order for me to arrive in time, get my required rest and start driving again, I will have to leave at 2.30am! That is half past two in the morning!!! HALF PAST TWO!!!!!!

I should have known better, but as another colleague pointed out: I said yes, so no point in griping about it now! *Gripe, gripe*

The plan

I had another email this week from Norway:

Hei

Vi takker for din søknad på jobb som bussjåfør i Tide Buss.

Vi har for øyeblikket ingen ledige stillinger som bussjåfør. Dersom du er interessert i eventuelt å være på en venteliste for ledig jobber i Tide, vil vi ta kontakt med deg i august for å avtale intervju og testkjøring.

Ønsker deg en fin sommer og ser frem til å treffe deg når sommeren er over.

Which basically means: "thank you for your application for Tide Buss. At the moment we don't have any openings for busdrivers, but if you are interested to be placed on the waiting list for any upcoming openings at Tide, we will get in touch with you in August for an interview and a test drive. We hope you have a nice sommer and we look forward to meeting you when the summer is over."

Now, this was from the same person I had spoken to on the phone, so this was quite a nice email to receive. Even if she had told me this in person as well.

So, about this plan: here goes! I will be off from July 29th until August 11th and hope to get some Norwegian lessons in the Netherlands. I will then be going to England for 8 days (work), after which I will have another week off. During that final week I hope to make my way to Norway and have said interview and test drive.

Tomorrow I will be sending some emails to find a nice (extremely) intensive private Norwegian course. I will also be booking my flight to Norway. Exciting stuff...

Trust

An actual real-life living snake around my neck

I never realised this morning as I left to go to work, that I would end up with a snake around my neck sometime during the afternoon, but that was what happened. But before that I got ambushed and painted green and black and brown.

The Russian Kaliningrad

It was the first day of the Navy Days, a recurring event in the Netherlands where the Navy shows off its work through their people, ships and other assorted thingymebobs. The first day is always reserved for the invited: veterans and schoolchildren. So, this morning me and two colleagues picked up a bunch of juvenile delinq high school students to take them to the navy yard. After having dropped them off, a couple of us drivers set off to the exhibition-part of the navy yard as well to see what was on offer.

I got quite a few comments looking like this. Why???

There was a big tent with coffee and stands that was filled with veterans, there were ships aplenty, including three foreign ones: the German Siegburg, the British HMS Lancaster and the Russian Kaliningrad which arrived as we were on the dock. There were tank-like things, helicopters, a guy with half his leg gone (I think it was a dummy), old fashioned tents and cots, field toilets and showers and there was a stand where you could get your face painted in camouflage colours. To which my colleague dragged me. As soon as I was only half in the chair, the 'painter' got to work and within a minute I had a green and black and brown face.

Perhaps I should also say that when we were walking along and I saw a little boy with camouflage colours I actually remarked that I would like that as well. Never let it be said that my colleagues are short of memory!

Stuck

I had some difficulty opening the door!

Several years ago, when I was younger, I got stuck in the sand one day. With my coach. Which weighed in at around 14 tons. Fortunately I managed to get a farmer out with his tractor and he pulled me out. Fast forward...

Stuck

Last Monday I had to take a group of people to a military base in Germany somewhere. The address wasn't right and they didn't really know where they were supposed to go, so when they saw their sign, they told me to take the turn. Which I did. I then drove on a cobbled road covered with dirt and sand. The next turning saw the road change to sort of gravel and dirt and sand. Do you see where I am going? So did I, but too late. And then I was stuck. No budging.

Hooking the tow cable onto the truck

Fortunately a recovery vehicle was close by and after a bit of 'where should I go?' between the men, they decided I would need to retrace my 'steps' (as it were), since the road was only getting a lot worse. They then proceeded to pull me out. The only thing damaged was my ego to some degree (not much though, don't worry on that score). After they had pulled me out, the recovery vehicle got in front of me and we drove back to the main road. I shook hands with the driver and went on my way to the hotel.

Another day, another adventure!

'Beverages'

I don't know when I first started drinking beer. It certainly was several years after having the mother of all hangovers due to too much rum (never drank the stuff since). I usually drink lager, since that is a bit lighter, but when I was staying at my sister's in April, I saw this bottle of beer and thought the name was brilliant. So, it was bought and subsequently drunk.

I don't think I will be buying it again any time soon, even if it were available in the Netherlands, but for one evening it was okay. A bit heavy perhaps, but still quite nice. And of course the name remains to be brilliant!!

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Clueless

I was clueless aged 20!
I did look good in yellow though....

According to my friend Pepperfly, I am now waiting for the 'Meaning of Life' (which comes at age 42), but this year will be the 'Clueless Year'. For some reason. Now, since my friend Pepperfly is a bit older than yours truly, I trust she speaks from experience and is just giving me her wisdom. If not, she is just a big meanie and knowing her, she can't be. Not really anyway.

Clueless? Well, I have been called worse!